Health For Fitness

how i deal with burnout and my feelings or whatever

November 05, 2023 Heather Mae

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Partial Transcript: I'm going to tell you five things that I'm going to stick to this week. Despite feeling like I just want to go to bed. Like I'm not mad. I'm not upset. Like nothing's wrong. Like, I'm just fucking tired

Hello, beautiful people. And welcome back to the =show==. 



Today's episode is going to be a little bit different. So I want to start by saying that I've been encouraged by those close to me. She'd be more vulnerable on the social media. 





And I do agree. I don't share a lot of the struggle, the business background stuff, like the like massive failures I have all of the time. 

You know, it's not, I'm not a person that owns a multi-billion dollar brand. I'm not a person that has broken world records. I'm not a person that has done anything and I'm not discrediting myself here like objectively. I am not a person that has done something extra, extra extraordinary. I don't necessarily feel like I need to share my struggle because it's like, I don't know. 

I feel almost that I had to believe that that's reserved for people that their lives almost appear like two dope I don't know. I think it's still good to be vulnerable. I think that if anybody gets anything out of what I have to say or feels like they can relate to it in some way it's worth it. 

So I don't really know why. I struggle with it. This is my first attempt. I am burned out to shit right now. So I thought, why not record a podcast episode about it? Cause when better. Then when I'm completely over it. I want to talk about burnout. What that kind of means when I say burnout, because I think burnout is different for everybody.

 I'm just going to talk you through how I tend to deal with burnout and some of the things that I do to kind of trick myself into feeling better. Nothing is wrong and everything is good by the way. 

Like, I don't want anybody to think that anything is going on that's big or like looming doom and glooming. It's not that at all. I have just been working a lot of hours. I'm just dealing with a lot of random business, dumb things that pop up and go wrong.   It's just a lot of moving parts. 

 As the business kind of grows and expands, which I'm so, so grateful for because they feel like it was so not the case for so long. I would have begged for these problems before. It took us this long to grow. The business, because we were so bad at business. And it's honestly a miracle that we made it through the pandemic. We made it by the skin of our teeth and that was a huge accomplishment, but it was, we just learned by fire and that time. And I think that. Talking about how hard that time was. 

It was not even something I was capable of because it was while we were in it. I was so. In it. That I didn't even really have time to be burned out. And I think that just now. The pandemic itself was one whole entire thing. And I'm sure we're all traumatized in our own little special ways from that, but the pandemic with

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I'm going to tell you five things that I'm going to stick to this week. Despite feeling like I just want to go to bed. Like I'm not mad. I'm not upset. Like nothing's wrong. Like, I'm just fucking tired Hello, beautiful people. And welcome back to the =show==. Today's episode is going to be a little bit different. So I want to start by saying that I've been encouraged by those close to me. She'd be more vulnerable on the social media. And I do agree. I don't share a lot of the struggle, the business background stuff, like the like massive failures I have all of the time. You know, it's not, I'm not a person that owns a multi-billion dollar brand. I'm not a person that has broken world records. I'm not a person that has done anything and I'm not discrediting myself here like objectively. I am not a person that has done something extra, extra extraordinary. I don't necessarily feel like I need to share my struggle because it's like, I don't know. I feel almost that I had to believe that that's reserved for people that their lives almost appear like two dope I don't know. I think it's still good to be vulnerable. I think that if anybody gets anything out of what I have to say or feels like they can relate to it in some way it's worth it. So I don't really know why. I struggle with it. This is my first attempt. I am burned out to shit right now. So I thought, why not record a podcast episode about it? Cause when better. Then when I'm completely over it. I want to talk about burnout. What that kind of means when I say burnout, because I think burnout is different for everybody. I'm just going to talk you through how I tend to deal with burnout and some of the things that I do to kind of trick myself into feeling better. Nothing is wrong and everything is good by the way. Like, I don't want anybody to think that anything is going on that's big or like looming doom and glooming. It's not that at all. I have just been working a lot of hours. I'm just dealing with a lot of random business, dumb things that pop up and go wrong. It's just a lot of moving parts. As the business kind of grows and expands, which I'm so, so grateful for because they feel like it was so not the case for so long. I would have begged for these problems before. It took us this long to grow. The business, because we were so bad at business. And it's honestly a miracle that we made it through the pandemic. We made it by the skin of our teeth and that was a huge accomplishment, but it was, we just learned by fire and that time. And I think that. Talking about how hard that time was. It was not even something I was capable of because it was while we were in it. I was so. In it. That I didn't even really have time to be burned out. And I think that just now. The pandemic itself was one whole entire thing. And I'm sure we're all traumatized in our own little special ways from that, but the pandemic with the gym and feeling like the gym got to a place where I was like, okay, we built it and we did it. And it was just blood, sweat, and tears. And just like. So so hard. And I thought that like that hard was the heart. I thought we'd like beat it. And I know that sounds ridiculous. And it does sound ridiculous to me too now, but I was like, we're making a profit every month. Like we're going on vacation. Like, things are good. This is great. Like we did it. We, we built the business. And then the pandemic just happened and it was just closed and I can't. It sounds so minute compared to, I know the things going on in the world. I, I understand that, but to me it was everything. And also it was me and Rob's income. Both of us, like we had a dog, we had an apartment, we had this lease on this fucking gym that is so expensive. Like it was so terrifying. I was 22, 23. I was. Literally a moron. And I really just was so unequipped and I knew I was on equipment. Like I was in it. So it wasn't that I was making a decision. We were in it. After the gym had opened back up, we were starting to gain more clients. Like things were actually like on paper, very much heading in the right direction. But. It didn't really matter because we were in a hole and that was very hard to deal with. Like we were doing everything right. And literally seeing the results, but because this massive deficit happened before. It was like, we were just drowning in quicksand, despite like literally swimming as hard as we get. It didn't, it didn't feel like it matched , I'm not doing the best job articulating this, but it was my first time, you know, opening up. So be patient with me. I just threw myself into anything that I felt I had an established skillset that would bring income in. So I took my nutrition business that's within the gym and I sort of. I separated. It like made a bunch of assets for it. Like now I have that, like, there's, there's good. That came of it, but I was so panicked that it. I was doing any action. I wasn't taking smart action. And the more I learned, the more I learned that I was just like out pouring effort into things that I was guessing or right. Rather than taking the effort, finding out what the right highest lever thing to do is in doing that. Once I realized that I did start to move in the other direction, but. Honestly, as ridiculous as it sounds just now I think the burnout of. Starting to feel like I'm competent in business actually for the first time. Keep in mind. I been in business for six years. Six years, six years. It has taken me. Six years. To even feel. Like I know the right things to do. I am so grateful that I have had the resources and found mentors and worked with people that I've done so much learning and I've done so much humbling. Of myself every single day. Like the time that you are. Really trying to accomplish something and desperately, desperately want it more than anything. Oh, my God. My self esteem was so in the gutter that I don't really even have words for it. Like it's not, it's just everyday. You're like, oh, wow, I'm wicked stupid again. Oh my God. That's crazy. I'm wicked stupid. Wow. They're like, definitely don't do it this way. I'm like, that's the way we've always done it. Like, just so, so unbelievably humbling. I'm so grateful. That I was humbled because I learned. But I got to a point where I've learned. And I was exhausted and I feel like I'm still in that phase because it's probably been. Almost two years. Since. Yeah. Just about Caso, Panda. Yeah. So about two years of feeling like I was even learning the right things and listening to the right people and getting results from the moves I was making specifically in business. And I talk about it in the business sense, but like, You have to remember, again, this is my livelihood. This is how I pay my bills. This is how my employees pay their bills. Like I like this is not a big business. This is, I have five employees like.. The pressure I felt, I understand. Is small compared to other things. But it felt like a lot more than that. It felt like it felt, I just, it was crushing. We spent. This about two years. Boring everything back into the gym, everything. Everything. Down payment that we were going to buy a house with, to the gym, everything. And. Just now. I'm just happy with it. But it's crazy how burned out. I feel. In the moment that I think. It's really, I would have just begged for this entire time. And I'm so grateful for it. And I'm so burned out. And when I say burned out, I genuinely mean I am just tired. Of the daily stress. I will take a vacation I'm sure for like three or four days and go somewhere where there's beachy things and I'm sure it will be a hundred percent fucking fine. I always do this when it starts to get cold. But I will say burnout to me does not feel like I hate my job. And I think that that's very important. I actually really, I it's not even like, I'm here doing my job and I'm pissed about it. Like, I'm actually really happy doing my job, interacting with my client. Like the, it doesn't make me miserable. Like some people are miserable at their jobs. I don't know that I'm the best person to advise on that because I genuinely do, like, what I do in that adds a layer of baseline happiness that I think if you don't have makes this much harder, But. Burned out to me, felt like holy shit.

I just can't wake up at 4:

30 AM for one more day in a row, or I'm going to explode, like just exhaustion and bandwidth. Just noticing my bandwidth is just going down. I'm a person that I, because I really love my job. And again, not the same, if you don't like what you do, if you work for someone and you can't fucking stand them, like you're never going to want to work 16 hours a day. That would be fucking ridiculous to expect. But because I really like what I do, and I'm really passionate about it. And I work for myself. I'm very, very, very lucky to work for myself. Like I get the results. So working a 16 hour day to me, It doesn't bother me. And it doesn't exhaust me in the way that it sounds like it might be exhausting. It's not the same as like, if you like, for example, like my mom's a preschool teacher and like, she cannot believe the amount of hours I work. I'm like, it's not the same. Like I'm not chasing around children and then reporting to their parents. And then their parents said something to my boss and then you have to talk like, that is so different from what my day looks like. If I wanted to leave right now, I could go get Starbucks. I'm literally recording a podcast. This is I'm at my job. This is my office. Those privileges are sprinkled throughout my day and it makes it very different. So. Because I can typically really enjoy that. I know when I start to be over it in like a typical Workday hours, like I don't want to do anymore. I'm not excited. That I'm over it. And that has sort of been the case for probably like a month now where I've just been exhausted. I overslept the other day. I haven't overslept for work like in like I D. It's doesn't happen. The message that I want to get through to this is number one, how I'm going to try to get myself not feeling this way. Number two is that you can both be very, very grateful and fucking over it because I'm, I had a hard time with that of being like, oh, like, fuck. I just, like, I just want a day where no one talks to me. And also being like, but I love when people's like, I don't, it doesn't mean I don't like it and I don't know if this will make sense to everyone, but it felt like it's very ungrateful to say ever that, like, I just want to date myself. Because things are finally going my way. I'm like, what an asshole? Like, it's just, it's nuts. Like, oh, like three years ago myself would smack the shit out of myself right now. Like what are you doing? Like it's working like. And I'm just tired. The first thing that I'm not going to do is I'm not going to go all in. I'm not going to say screw it. I'm not going to be like, no. I'm back on track. Like I'm back, like I'm not going to do either of those things. And I suggest you don't either. If you're feeling the same way. The other things that I wrote down when I'm going to do things that mimic succeeding and small wins, um, I actually, I like this. So I think that the feeling of failure, the feeling of success depends how we define them prior. So people will feel like they failed. If they expect on vacation to stick to their diet, they stick to when they're in their normal routine at home, they're setting themselves up to feel like they failed, even if they tried and did pretty well. Considering the circumstances. So for me, like drinking enough water, going to a workout class once or twice a week, the two minute rule, like if I really don't want to do something, telling myself I'll only do it for two minutes. Sometimes I literally only do it for two minutes. Like I'm like, I'll do the dishes for two minutes and. Most of the time I finish it, sometimes I literally will just stop. I think that people out of motion stay out of motion and that's especially true for me. The worse, my kind of like dampening of my mood gets, I think the harder it is to get back into not feeling that way. And I know it's different for everyone, but. Depression is interesting and depression and anxiety and all of these things, Alex or mosey says something about this that I actually really, like. He says that sadness is when you don't know what to do. You have a lack of options, you are just lost. Anxiety is when you have too many options. So you don't know what to do. Identifying if either of those may be resonate, I don't know that it will solve things, but it at least can help you sort things in your head, which is sometimes still very, very helpful. So. Depression when it can be solved. And there are, this is not a mental health talk. This is people go through periods of depression all the time for several reasons. And some of them can be very much solved and not crazy ways. I feel the need to say, but it's fairly obvious. I'm not talking, I'm not a psychologist. I'm not talking to somebody that needs way more than this. This is for people that haven't tried anything and are just looking for something to bring them up a little bit. I use the word depression, because I think people identify with it. Not because you're necessarily have to be diagnosed, depressed, or like you can feel depressed. You can, it's just, it's an adjective that people will pin on themselves. And I think that sometimes that makes you feel stuck. Depression when it can be solved. Typically a deficiency. Typically some sort of event. Typically some sort of. X sternal or internal trigger. That leads to a series of events that continue, so this dread feeling, depressive, feeling whatever you want to call it. Most people could be 45 days away from losing, not dreaded feeling. There are many people that this will not solve their issues. However, the people that have a deficiency, like I am such a bitch in winter, I am awful. Oh my God, I'm awful. And if I literally just take vitamin D I feel a million times better. It's ridiculous. If you live in a place where it gets cold, see if you have a vitamin D deficiency, if you are sad, literally all winter. So. Other things, people that are super, super out of shape, people that have a terrible life of that, whatever it is, whatever has gotten you out of motion. That thing doesn't have to go away for you to get back on track. I'm going to tell you five things that I'm going to stick to this week. Despite feeling like I just want to go to bed. Like I'm not mad. I'm not upset. Like nothing's wrong. Like, I'm just fucking tired. I wrote an entirely different episode and here we are, this insanity trip we're on it's improv hour over here. I'm just going to tell you what I'm going to do. If it helps you great. If you're like, wow, I really liked this person until I figured out that she was actually a lunatic. That's too bad. I get it. That's okay. I'm happy that you stayed as long as you did. So five things I'm going to stick to this week, despite feeling. Like a bag of shit. I am going to work out twice. I've already worked out once I have to work out one more time to make that true. That's not hard. I can do that. I'm going to set myself up to feel like I succeeded. I'm going to eat vegetables at dinner because that's not hard either. I have a million bags of frozen vegetables in the fridge. I can just fucking eat them. I'm going to take time to edit this podcast because it makes me happy or whatever. I'm not going to act how I feel as much as possible. I'm doing a bad job of that one. Right now. I am going to share it, which I've never done. Let's see if it helps. I don't know that it will, I'm not really a talk about it type a bitch, but you know, we're, we're trying new things. We're trying new things. So. I don't know if this was ranty or helpful. I don't know that it was, I don't even know. I don't know what this was. I apologize. I think. Or you're welcome. Stay tuned. There is something completely free. Completely exciting. I am bringing to you this new years. This is. Going to replace your new year's resolution. So throw them away. That is all I'm going to say, but I will say everyone can participate. If you are listening to this, you are able to participate. And if you want to participate more, you'll be able to. But everything you will need. We'll be completely free. On this podcast. So if you're not subscribed, please subscribe. I am trying to help simplify health and fitness for 1 million people. If that is true for you, please leave a review. That is how I'm measuring, and I appreciate you. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you guys for listening. And oh my God. I cannot believe you're still here.

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